Emotions that are coming to a boiling point

[DarthDaddy]

Well Here Goes...

My wife has been getting more and more emotional the last few weeks coming up on mothers day. The baby we lost was DUE that weekend and the emotions are running high... To top all this off we are attempting to get PG again and we are not. For my wife this is extra frustrating since EVERY time we have tried in the past (including the two we have lost) first Month and BAM!... We are now on our third month and she is rather upset. Last month she saw here doctor since her cycle has been really messed up... The Dr put her on Clomed (Sp) to help get her system on line.

Here is the REAL kicker.... Next weekend is when her monthly "friend" visits... If she is pregnant then all is well, if not I feel we will be in for an awful weekend...

So if you do not here from me after next weekend it is because she has killed me in an emotional rage, hid the body and moved... :P :twisted:

Just venting and not knowing at all what to say or not to say... I think no matter what I say I am going to be wrong...

Hormones, Sadness and Stress are going to be the death of me...

[jungle jim]

Well Here Goes...

Hormones, Sadness and Stress will be the death of us all...

I adjusted that last line.
Hang in there :)

[DaddyO]

Hormones, Sadness and Stress are going to be the death of me...

Rent The Perfect Storm and lock yourself in the basement/office for a week or two.

[Indy]

This is why they invented crusades!

[ministermatt]

Inside out! That is the way we need to live. Don't give into emotional living, that is the easy way out. Yelling and screaming don't do any good. I once heard that yelling at your kids is like trying to turn a car by honking the horn. The same can be said for dealing with our wives. They are wired different. Fragile & tender. We are suppose to be strong, willing to bend if needed, but unmovable. Like a 50 year old Oak tree. It bends in the strong winds but does not let external forces move it. Once in a while though a storm comes along so strong it breaks the tree. It is easy to give in to the urge to get emotional with our wives, but that is the last thing they need. They have girl friends for that. Stay strong. Be supportive, look for ways to comfort.

We faced similar issues trying to get PG with #6. It took 4months as opposed to the usual 1 with the first 5. Seemed like all we had to do was mention the word pregnant and she was. My wife had a hard time every time that time of the month proved she was NOT pregnant. I could not waive a magic wand and change that fact. All I could do was listen, dry her tears and be the rock of support she needed.

I will shut up now. Good luck and let us know. I am new to this sight but what a great tool for us to vent and get ideas and share our experience.

[sao95]

Who would want to be an oak? If I was a tree I would want to be a weeping willow. And emotions shouldn't be equated with yelling and screaming at your kids, if that's what emotion means to you then you have issues. And I think both parents should be able to mourn a miscarriage to the same degree.
That aside, since you know this is coming up Darth you have two choices in my opinion, wait for it to happen or try to counter it. Go overboard on mothers day, stress to the point of stupidity what a great mother she is, lots of presents and homemade cards from the little one. Pack the day so full of things to do and praise that hopefully you'll be able to keep her mind from dwelling on the miscarriage and next pregnancy, just my 2 cents :wink: ... hope everything goes well for ya....

[ministermatt]

sao said "hopefully you'll be able to keep her mind from dwelling on the miscarriage and next pregnancy,"

Your wife will remember no matter what you do. Don't ignore the fact of the tragic miscarraige. We experienced that also. Even today if I talk about our 7 kids, my wife corrects me and gently says 8. That was 9 years ago. I am sure your wife is a great mom with great kids and yes you should celebrate that to the extreme and take time to be there for her sorrow. You may not know what to say and that is OK, just be there.

[sao95]

sao said "hopefully you'll be able to keep her mind from dwelling on the miscarriage and next pregnancy,"

Your wife will remember no matter what you do. Don't ignore the fact of the tragic miscarraige. We experienced that also. Even today if I talk about our 7 kids, my wife corrects me and gently says 8. That was 9 years ago. I am sure your wife is a great mom with great kids and yes you should celebrate that to the extreme and take time to be there for her sorrow. You may not know what to say and that is OK, just be there.

dwell·ing (dwĕl'ĭng) pronunciation
n.

A place to live in; an abode.

re·mem·ber (rĭ-mĕm'bər) pronunciation

v., -bered, -ber·ing, -bers.

v.tr.

1.
1. To recall to the mind with effort; think of again: I finally remembered the address.
2. To recall or become aware of suddenly or spontaneously: Then I remembered that today is your birthday.
2. To retain in the memory: Remember your appointment.
3. To keep (someone) in mind as worthy of consideration or recognition.
4. To reward with a gift or tip.
5. To give greetings from: Remember me to your family.
6. Engineering. To return to (an original shape or form) after being deformed or altered.
7. Electronics. To carry out (a programmed or preset activity).
8. Archaic. To remind.

v.intr.

[UK Basketball Fan]

This is why they invented crusades!

LMAO---I'll second that one Indy!

Hang in there Darth, we'll keep you in our thoughts and prayers this weekend!

[DarthDaddy]

Thanks for the support everyone... I am truly hoping she is PG so Sunday will be focused on the happy time.

I am hit a little more then I thought I would with this whole thing, but I do not have the added joy of the hormones being out of wack. I am not feeling as bad for this day as the sadness I am remembering for the day I had to get the ashes.

He is a quote from my Blog and I am sure a post here as well...

"I Close my eyes, only for a moment and that moments gone."
Dust in the Wind, Kansas

Well today I went to the Funeral Home and picked up the ashes of our unborn child. It was much more difficult then I could have ever thought. Of course the people there are extremely nice and have that calming tone, but none the less it was extremely difficult. I don't think I was actually prepared to see that little white box... You think you can prepare yourself for this kind of thing, but there is no way. The emotional rollercoaster ride is finally coming to an end, but not before a VERY steep drop. If it was not for the fact that my 1 year old was with me I think I would have completely gone nuts. His little smile somehow just makes the sadness of the world disappear. Just when you think you are going to go crazy, there is that smile and twinkle... Poof, the sadness does not seem so bad. At this point I am pretty worthless for anything that involves any form of concentration. The moment I attempt to think I just get pulled back toward the hole, that is sadness. My wife is coming home a little early and we have decided to go look at a few model homes. We keep thinking about moving, but that will not be for some time. Looking at the model homes is like a hobby for my wife. Hopefully this distraction along with my two wonderful boys will get us through the rest of the day.

The sadness of this day is revisiting me as well. This is something I will always remember and have to deal with as well as my wife. I can only do my best to be strong and not faulter in her time of need...

Thank you all once again and hopefully I will be able to bring a little Extra Joy here this weekend...

Be Well

[jeffus]

We buried our nephew, Eric a few years ago.... :cry:

Full term, saddest day I've known watching that shoebox go into the ground. Stillborn.

I cannot begin to imagine your pain. :cry:

[DarthDaddy]

Well the weekend went by with very little problem. We were both so busy we did not dwell too much. i was gone all day Saturday and she was out shopping and went to here sisters with the kids for a birthday party for one of our nieces.

She tested on Saturday which should have been the day "Aunt Flow" showed up. The test was negative... This put an early damper on the day, but soon moved on... (Used a very cheap test that came with something else)

Sunday still no "Aunt Flow" Had a good mothers day and spent much of it running around doing things..

Monday STILL NO Aunt Flow... On the way home from work she purchased new tests since she is now LATE. Not wanting to wait for the morning pee she tested tonight....

Within SECONDS the test changed and see the result below...
..
...
....
.....
......
.......
........
.........





http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c158/darthdaddy/twolines2.jpg

A Little faint, but with no Aunt Flow, and how quickly the second line showed up... :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

She will test again tomorrow and then speak to her Doctor... After her visit there which will not be for a few weeks since he waits for a certain time frame after being LATE... If everything goes well...YEAH!!!

This however is our last try. If there are complications again we will be done and then look into the adoption thing...

HERE IS TO HOPING... :D

[Will'sdad]

Keeping my fingers crossed for you and yours. Good Luck.

[Cubfan]

I think it's a very good sign. Ours was really faint like that the first time too. Keep us posted.

[SGTDad]

Good luck to you!

[Will'sdad]

Well Darth.

That'll mean the two of us having kids in January. 8) :) :D :lol: laughing

We got the same results today and will be seeing the Dr. sometime this week.

OH $HIT HERE WE GO AGAIN!

The first was a bit dicy so we'll be cheering once the first trimester is over. She'll be on a very strict regimen avoiding all chemicals which may pass through the placenta for the first and second trimested. This'll include hair dye, nail polish, nail polish remover, any varnish or other solvent based material, degreaser etc and her dry cleaned clothes will be unbagged and left to hang in an open room for at least a day.
That's great Louis! Conratulations!! We just had our first ultrasound for the second one. 11 weeks. Little bugger was kicking around and moving all over. Very cool.

[DarthDaddy]

Well Darth.

That'll mean the two of us having kids in January. 8) :) :D :lol: laughing

We got the same results today and will be seeing the Dr. sometime this week.

OH $HIT HERE WE GO AGAIN!

The first was a bit dicy so we'll be cheering once the first trimester is over. She'll be on a very strict regimen avoiding all chemicals which may pass through the placenta for the first and second trimester. It's such a delicate, complex and infinitely timed orchestration of enzyme induced cell diffrentiation and specilaization that we're not taking any chances on an external "adductor" interfering. This'll include: gasoline, hair dye, nail polish, nail polish remover, any varnish or other solvent based material, degreaser etc. and her dry cleaned clothes will be unbagged and left to hang in an open room for at least a day.

This will be Pregnancy number 5 and we have 2 kids. Hopefully we will be able to get by the 17 WEEK time frame.

CONGRATS to you as well. I hope all goes smoothly for you too. This is a wonderful thing and a bit scary with the last issue...

[jeffus]

Hey - Congrats! (To everybody!) :D

[sao95]

chugchug: wow, everyone is knocked up, congrats Darth and Louis :D chugchug:

[Jackson's Dad]

Congrats to your both! Best of luck to your wives as they go through all this!

[DarthDaddy]

I agree Louis...We will have some interesting time on our hands... Plus my wife gets ALL DAY SICKNESS for the first 20+ weeks YEAH!

Oh.... Pass the BEEEEEEERRRRRSSSS

[tt3]

Man, I skip a few threads now and then and see what I miss?!?!

Congrats to you both!

[Ma(tt)Daddy]

YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH Darth and Louis!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guys this thread brought tears to my eyes . . . sincere congratulations, and the best best best of luck to you both and your beautiful women!


=D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> \:D/ \:D/ \:D/ \:D/ \:D/ \:D/ \:D/ \:D/ beerslide beerslide beerslide beerslide beerslide beerslide beerslide laughing laughing laughing laughing laughing laughing laughing

[DarthDaddy]

Well my wife is a bit paranoid at the moment. She goes in tomorrow for a blood draw and they will test hormone levels by doing another draw in a few days.

She took the other test this morning and was getting a bit wigged out since it was not an bright a line. She took the other sample test she had as well to make sure. 3 tests said yes... She then made me this afternoon get another pack of tests this time the fancy "Digital" kind that actually have a little digital display that says Pregnant or Not Pregnant...

Took another and it also said Pregnant....

I guess she is allowed to be rather paranoid at this point and we will not stop holding our breaths until we have a healthy baby in our arms...

January we will be out numbered.... 3 kids... 2 Adults...

:lol:

[Bollux]

man must have blown 50 bucks on tests...but i am sure on the grand scale the money doesnt matter.

[woodchuck]

Congradulations to both of you super squirters.

Louis: you forgot the extra 6-10 weeks after for recovery, you actually have more like 46-52 weeks to go. :cry:

[jeffus]

Hah! They'll be too busy trying to survive to worry about that for a while! :D

[DarthDaddy]

For us the only thing we aill have to deal with is the sickness... With regards to Whoopie... Up until the end... :D

My last two were induced the old fashioned way... :wink: :wink: :wink:


Drinks for me will be for all the BARFING....

[Bollux]

*passes a rock glass filled with tequila*

You're gonna need it =p

[UK Basketball Fan]

Congrats guys!

[tt3]

Congradulations to both of you super squirters.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

[jeffus]

Here endith the carpet-bombing campaign! Holster your weapons! :D :wink: